When we started our search for the Nation’s Flavourite, the suggestions were all so innocent.
Given the chance to choose what our new Handcrafted Flavour would be, the British public didn’t let us down, and came up with some truly delicious sounding concoctions.
And then, seemingly without warning, things got out of hand in the most hilarious of ways.
To give you an idea what we mean, here are some of the completely outrageous suggestions that didn’t quite make the cut.
Oh internet, never change.
1. Eminem’s Mom’s Spaghetti
If you had one shot, one opportunity, to seize the flavour you wanted, in one moment, would you really vote for this?
2. Unicorn Tears
We actually loved this suggestion but just had a few worries about production. Like, come on, when have you ever seen a unicorn cry?.
3. Benedict Cumberbatch
It just sounds like a fart in a bath, doesn’t it?
4. A vague whiff of vinegar very far away
Where do we even start with this one?
5. Haggis & Watermelon
Ladies and gentlemen, it appears we have the next Heston Blumenthal in our midsts.
6. Petrol Station Sushi
We gagged. Did you gag? We bet you gagged.
7. Teen Angst
Best enjoyed while listening to My Chemical Romance and hiding in your room.
8. Toothpaste & Orange Juice
We have passed this person’s name onto the authorities who are investigating what kind of monster could suggest a thing like this.
9. Plaster in a public pool
We’re not sure if this was a flavour suggestion or a political statement just DON’T LET IT TOUCH US.
10. Bellybutton Fluff
Urgh. Seriously though, why is it always blue?
Not today, Satan.
12. Spotted d*ck
We were all ready to get offended and then we found out this is actually a fruit pudding. Still, it’s a no.
13. An actual frog
The internet is not a nice place.
14. Vodka flavour
We salute this creative genius who is a sure bet to be the next winner of The Apprentice.
You’ll probs be happy to know that we’re not offering you any of these. Instead, we’re giving you a chance to VOTE for the flavour that tickles your taste buds most. Take us up on it, and you could soon see your winner in bar!
But what will our new Handcrafted Flavour be, we hear you ask?
Come on, has democracy ever tasted this good?