The Easter bank holiday is just around the corner so we’ve put together a timeline of how it’s all gonna play out. Because, y’know, it’s good to plan your demise before it inevitably happens.
Thursday 12 noon: There is literally no point me being here. My mind is already at the bar.
Thursday 4.30pm: It’s going to be hot, rumours of a heatwave are definitely, 100% true. The BBC weather forecast does not lie.
Thursday 5pm: Don’t think I’ve felt euphoria like this. Work? Hell no. The good times start here.
Friday 11am: It’s raining. Summer is not here. But I don’t give one, because I’m in bed. On a Friday. At 11am. And I’m not going to get fired. Jeremy Kyle is going on.
Friday 12 noon: Jeremy Kyle sucks. I’m not missing anything.
Friday 1pm: Let’s get back on it. It’s ok, it’s “ brunch.”
Friday 6pm: Out.
Saturday 11am: There’s STILL 2 and a half days to go! I am so free. It’s like school summer holidays all over again.
Saturday 6pm: Going out, out.
Sunday 4pm: It’s Sunday and there’s no sad feelings. Best. Thing. Ever.
Sunday 6pm: Let’s take it a bit easier tonight. Tomorrow I’m going to go for a run, sort my finances out and read that book I started a year ago.
Monday 11am: This is 3 days worth of a hangover. I need another bank holiday ASAP. Please god, no-one open the curtains.
Monday 11.30am: I wish the sun would do one.
Monday 6pm: I haven’t showered. Still in pjs. Dark thoughts setting in: I wonder if I can pull a sicky tomorrow? If I do make it to work, do I have to shower?
Monday 8pm: At least this week’s going to go quickly (just a heads up, it won’t).
Tuesday 9am: What’s my job again?
Sound familiar? You’re our kinda person. Starting on Thursday 2nd April, we’re going in to party overdrive, kicking it all off with Happy Hour from 5pm-7pm. And we’ve made Good Friday, a freakin’ brilliant Friday with extended Happy Hour from 12 noon -7pm.
Get the full cracking line-up here.