We know a thing or two about parties – after all, it’s what we do. And as the biggest party of the year is just around the corner, we’ve put together a survival guide to help you through it.

Why should you need our help? Because, if not done correctly, NYE can go horribly awry. You might find yourself at a shocker of an unplanned house party, holding your mate’s hair back after she glugged that bottle of MD 20/20. Or worse, it might just be you, your PJs, a multipack of Jaffa Cakes and Jools Holland’s Hootenanny. Ew.
Nope, here’s a quick post to help you squeeze every last little bit of fun out of what’s frankly gonna be quite a bit of a banger.

Get a plan together

Don’t leave it until the last minute. If the above didn’t scare you into making plans, the following will: EVERYBODY that ‘plans’ to stay in on NYE regrets it. Then, it’s gets to 10:30pm, the panic kicks in, and they end up at Neil the creepy neighbour’s house. Drinking warm cava from a squashed plastic cup. Do you really want that for yourself?

Don’t be the already-drunk mate

You’ve done it. You’re out, and the party’s just starting to pick up. The bar is packed with McFitty biscuits, and the drinks are flowing freely. Everyone’s feelin’ good… Except your one already-way-too-drunk friend. They were wasted even before the taxi came – it’s not even 9pm and they’re giving out unsolicited hugs, there’s no way they’ll last ‘til midnight. If you haven’t got one of these in your group, well then my friend – it’s probably you. You have been warned.

Don’t freak out about missing midnight

Ah, the Time-Panicker. For some reason, NYE makes people develop a perpetual fear of missing midnight. They’ll demand “What’s the time?!” in the same voice you’d shout “Call 999!”. They also bang on about how “people in Japan/Australia/Thailand have already done their countdown and are well into next year… Isn’t that weird?”. No, it’s boring, so do NOT be this person!

Don’t give the bottle to the Incompetent Champagne-Popper

Basically, this person can’t open a bottle of bubbly to save their life. They usually go in way too over-confident, leading to a champers-flavoured water cannon that wouldn’t be out of place at the Formula 1. Stand back, shield your eyes, and don’t be disappointed when someone hands you a half-glass of warm Prosecco, complete with bits of cork and foil.

Don’t bother with New Year’s resolutions

You and your mates will all stand round, universally agreeing that New Year’s resolutions are bullsh*t. Which they are. But you’ll still find that you’re secretly promising yourself to eat more healthy/hit the gym/give up reading Buzzfeed for actual real-life books. Don’t bother – it ain’t happening.

Go wild during the countdown

Big Ben will go bong, everyone yells “Happy New Year!” and you’ll grab and hug your mates (that you’ve been with all night) like you haven’t seen ‘em since… well, last year. Make the most, because it truly is a magical time.

And lastly… Book a bloody taxi

Come 3am, you’ll leave the party and find yourself negotiating your way through a post-Apocalyptic landscape, packed full of zombies in a desperate search for the world’s last taxi. Do yourself a favour and get one booked beforehand. No drama!

Now you’ve read this handy survival guide, you should be in for a gooden’.

We’re even helping you out with our very first point by pointing you in this direction: where you can book a New Year’s Eve party at a Revolution bar near you. Thank us later.

Three little letters. One massive party. We can’t wait for it either.

 

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